When life gives you lemon.

 

When life gives you lemon, you make it lemonade. But if life gives you nothing, you make nothing out of it. It's better to have a lemonade than to have nothing.  Life is never empty, there is always something somewhere silently available.  The power to grab that thing is called confidence.

So, last month I met a woman, she was around 45, with two kids and a divorce. The kids were like 10 and 14. Her beauty was average, at 45 she looked 50 and the only feature that attracted my attention was her smile. That was mesmerizing. She talked very less, mostly about her kids, or complaining about her marriage and how her in-laws and husband ruined her life. I got curious about her after knowing that at 43 she had taken a divorce, single since two years.

We were talking to each other as we sat next to each other in the AC waiting room in Kolkata station waiting room. I asked her, about her life after divorce and got a lame common answer. I asked what actually happened, and she showed no interest in replying to me.  So I changed the topic and asked what you do to meet your ends. She laughed and laughed and then smiled, and said, “I worked for twenty years for a mean man so now he paid for my job.” It was a good sum of alimony that was paid to her. I was curious to know more, like what her relatives, kids, and society had an impact on her. And I was curious because I was trying to understand about marriage and its life.

Was she happy doing this, instead of asking her, I thought to observe her behavior towards people, things, and situations. This gives an overall idea about the person’s mental situation. I kept looking at her elder daughter, who looked just like her mother, and the son who looked like his father, I guess. The kids were fidgeting over a packet of chips and the girl seemed more dominating. While the fight was too loud by now her mother shouted at the girl and then the chips were all of her younger brothers. Here again a girl sacrificed her needs to become a good girl for her mother. At this very young age she was behaving like half mother to the boy.

I went out and bought two samosas and asked her would like to share them, she smiled and said I don’t eat oily food. I went out and started to stroll on the platform looking at passengers and trains. I bought a book to read. While getting back in the cabin I saw her eating the patties and chips. She looked bewildered and smiled at me. I looked at her with surprise, what about the oil now? Anyways, I got bored and I wanted my train to come now. Suddenly she started to explain to me, “I was really hungry and felt that eating a few chips won’t raise my cholesterol as I am suffering from diabetes”.  I showed sympathy to it and asked how long. “Yes, last year only I felt all the symptoms of diabetes, so when I got myself, tested my sugar level was excess high.” On that her daughter said, “I give her medicine on time, mummy will get better in one year only.” Then our discussion started to move on to my parents, my father also got diabetes at his 45th year and so my mother. Both got it in the same year. We discussed natural medicines, yoga, and other method that can be helpful.

Then again a silence, it gave me a chance to talk to her daughter, I looked at her, smiled, and asked, "do you want some chocolates"?, to which she said yes. I said, “Let's go out and buy some for you.” To which she looked at her mother for permission, and reluctantly her mother nodded yes. We went out to a nearby stall and bought chocolates. There I asked her, “ Where does your father lives.” She said here in Kolkata.  I asked her "why did she left your father", And she looked confused and shy to answer. So who is in Delhi, “No one, we are going to Delhi to visit the place, after that, we will go to Agra and return via Haridwar”. The excitement was so clear on her face. “are you not missing your father?”, “No one is missing him, my mother has made some good decisions in her life now, we are happy with it.” She said proudly.

Here I got my answer, it’s not important if she is happy or not, if she will able to meet ends or not, it’s important if is she satisfied, and content with what decisions she has made. Here I was seeing a powerful, confident, and independent woman who took her lemon to make it into a sweet lemonade. A mother taking two young children alone to big cities all by herself to just have a vacation is not very common in our country. I was at that moment inspired, to be confident enough to take a stand for my decisions and the right steps that are important for my growth in life. Its important to walk on path created by you because you are not a pet. Take risk and live for yourself. The danger of passing or failing is always there, the important part is whether are you on the path drawn by yourself or someone else. Life will always try to give you a lemon, you should learn it by the experience how to make a good lemonade. Problems, anger, dissatisfaction, and disappointment are a part and parcel of life don’t take these as danger or something to stop you from making your decisions. Move on, learn with experience and stand and walk. Walk until you reach the goal set by you. The pleasure and happiness that one gets after reaching a the goal is immeasurable.

I have learned a lesson today, anyone can teach you a lesson that is going to help you in reaching your goals. Fear ends when you start to believing in your decision and your ability. Don’t be dependent, just because you think someone else is authorized to guide your life. Take charge, fight, and walk to reach the goal. I went back to the cabin and she was talking to her son and it seemed that she was good enough for her kids and could build the happiest environment for all of them.